Wednesday, October 15, 2014

Expecting #4!

What craziness! We're expecting baby #4 April 30th, in case you haven't heard. Which would explain the serious lack of updates on our blog. I've felt so awful for the last 7 weeks, some nights I went to bed at 7:00. Of course it all started right around when we started school, and let me tell you, homeschooling while feeling like you could either throw up or fall asleep = no fun. But we've gotten through it. Barely.

This pregnancy has been wrought with emotion and anxiety. When I went to my first appointment at 7 weeks, I showed up there fully expecting to not see a heartbeat. I was terrified. Every other pregnancy, I had very little anxiety. But once you experience firsthand the fact that not every pregnancy results in a baby, it ushers in a whole new height of anxieties. Obviously, things turned out well, and I left feeling extreme relief.

Today I went in for my second appointment. Right away, we could see the baby, kicking and squirming like crazy. I don't remember being able to see so much so clearly at 12 weeks. We even got an ultrasound pic of the baby waving.

I cried almost the entire drive home. I cried out of sheer gratefulness to God. In April, it was as if I had been given a gift, only to have it taken away. I am so thankful for another chance.

"You have turned my mourning into joyful dancing." Psalm 30:11